Treegasm
Treegasm is the fifth episode in Season 1 of Ugly Americans. Synopsis Mark Lilly counsels a pair of treetures (tree creatures) who are expected to perform in a public mating ritual sanctioned by New York City as a festival. Meanwhile a molting Callie Maggotbone demands the kinkiest kind of sex from Mark. Randall Skeffington finds his penis missing. Plot Tourists visit Central Park for "Treegasm", a once-in-a-lifetime mating ritual between two tree creatures, or "treetures". The treetures grow towards each other for decades before engaging in a ritual known as "screwing". Mark Lilly cannot understand why people care about two trees losing their virginity. Demon bureaucrat Twayne Boneraper has been appointed to be in charge of the ceremony, but gives the job to Mark and wizard Leonard Powers instead. Meanwhile, demon Callie Maggotbone keeps making Mark have sex with her. Leonard explains to Mark that a female demon's body is so toxic that she has to periodically shed it for a new one, and that sex is the only thing that can ease her pain. Later in Central Park, Mark introduces himself to the treetures, Neil and Nicky, as their "screwing coordinator". Mark remarks that it is refreshing for two beings to be so committed to each other as opposed to just having sex with strangers for pleasure. Neil later breaks up with Nicky as he finds Mark's remarks about casual sex sounds more exciting. Randall Skeffington finds out his penis (together with his testicles) has gone missing after having sex with Karen, a peculiar female creature that he met at the movie theater. Leonard explains to Mark that Neil must mate with Nicky because their roots run deep and encompass Manhattan. If Neil does not ejaculate soon, he may develop "blue roots" which would swell up and endanger the entire city. Twayne assigns Mark to fix the problem. Mark enlists Randall to talk about his unhealthy sex experiences to Neil. Randall's stories horrify Neil and lead him to change his mind and go back to Nicky. Later, "Treegasm" has become a public spectacle and has drawn huge crowds to Central Park. The event is about to commence, but Neil gets nervous from the spectators. His roots swell up and protrude from the ground, and bring about various disasters to the city. Also, the pressure causes his sexual organ to go flaccid. Leonard enchants him with a magical spell that acts like Viagra. Callie's shedding has hideously deformed her skin. She takes Mark into a portable toilet for another intercourse. Just as Neil is about to screw Nicky, Callie sheds and reveals her naked new body amongst the crowd, which seems to cause Neil to have a "premature esapulation", and makes him ejaculate all over the people in the park. The crowd seems disappointed. Later, after the crowd is gone, Leonard enchants Neil with a spell to make his organ less sensitive to help with the mating. When Randall is about to blow his own brains out, he receives a call from the Port Authority police. Officer Boyle informs him that they have found his penis, but it did not fall off - it ran away because it did not like the way that Randall treated it. In order to ensure its return, Randall must agree to several conditions, such as accepting it as an equal, to which Randall gladly agrees. Trivia * After shedding her skin, the image of Callie and the people around her looks similar to the Italian Renaissance painting, The Birth of Venus. Character and Species Appearances Central Characters * Neil and Nicky, treetures * Mark Lilly, human * Callie Maggotbone, demon * Randall Skeffington, zombie * Leonard Powers, wizard * Officer Boyle * Randall Skeffington's penis Supporting Characters In order of appearance: * Chloe * Scott * Girl Anchor * Narration: Treegasm: A Retrospective * Narration on another Treegasm program * An MTV shirtless host * ''America's Next Top Wizard'' judges * Twayne Boneraper * Karen's friend * Karen, unidentified species * Leonard's first time lover * Nicky's parents, treetures * In Mark's class: ** Erik, robot ** Doug, koala person ** Toby, fish person ** Croatian Man ** Blue amoeba, amoeba ** Green amoeba, amoeba * A New York woman interviewed by NY2 * Bob Sanchez, cyclops * Zazzerbos and Gary * Al Pacino * A couple, the man is proposing to the woman Notable Non-speaking Appearances In order of appearance: * Land whale, in an NY2 image * A furry skull-headed humanoid, in a helmet, outside the DOI * Werewolf, in a DOI poster * In America's Next Top Wizard video: ** Kizard, wizard ** Shark people ** Bread heads * Leprechaun, in a DOI poster * In Mark's class: ** Great Brain, thought-monster ** Martin, two-headed worm creature ** Marguerette ** Three-eyed tentacle person * In Leonard's magical slides: ** Green-skin person ** Vampire ** Deer person * Ray, zombie, Randall's friend in a wedding video * In Randall's montage: ** Tico, unidentified species ** Phallusoid ** Pig person ** A humanoid hybrid with an upper human torso and a lower canine torso * During the Treegasm event: ** Giant hares ** Giant baby ** An octopus musician in a band ** A giant lobster musician in a band ** Backward-headed person ** A person with horns on the head ** Blob ** Giant chicken ** Ape people ** Merperson ** Yeti ** Scuba person ** A green slug with arms, driving a carriage * Elephant person * Bird people See also * Treeture Category:Episodes Category:Season 1